He was the 'class monitor'. The position was conferred upon a student who was any of:
(a) the brightest student in class
(b) the teacher’s pet
(c) the loudest student in class
(d) the largest student in class
(e) the naughtiest student in class
In his case, only (a) and (b) applied. She was proud of that fact. He was, of course, the cutest boy in class too. ;-) She was eight and a half. He was three months older than her. Crush #1.
*****
She was the 'class monitor' ... on the girls’ side. As per the rules of the class, another was required on the boys’ side. He qualified on none of counts (a to e) above but he just had that look, the sensible, responsible gentleman. He was paired with her as the other class monitor. She was nine and some months. He was ten. Crush #2A (his).
Fast forward >> She had just turned fourteen. He had served as Vice-Head Boy for the primary and junior high classes in the previous years. He was one of the few ‘all-round’ athletes (refers to the variety of sports/ athletic events, not the physical attributes) in junior high. Now that he was also transforming into one of the tall, dark and handsome variety, she noticed him more than ever before. Crush #2B (hers). The tables had turned!
*****
She met him at a cousin’s wedding. The relation to the cousin made him her relative. Damn! His disarming smile, model-like good looks, and charming personality made for an irresistible combo. The butterflies in her stomach fluttered harder because he silently returned the flirtatious admiration through the mischievous glint in his eye. She was on the brink of her twenties; he a couple of years older. Crush #8.
*****
The workplace had its pros and cons: it afforded her the opportunity to gaze at him without having to make a special effort to be around him, but it forced her to comply with implicit rules of propriety in a workplace, which disallowed the chances of a greater personal connection. Her finesse with people problems intrigued him. He sought her opinion on a range of issues from the mundane to the esoteric. He sported a smile that was to die for! His athletic strut was mesmerizing. Crush #15.
*****
What causes attraction to somebody? Sometimes, the reasons are as simple as (a) to (e) above. At other times, it’s the aesthetic element at play. Beauty is still a highly valued attribute. At still others, the scientific attraction (the physical chemistry of biology) is the culprit. But these are too superficial to interest a human spirit for too long. But won’t you agree that a combination of these matched with the intensity of an emotional connection, and the luxury of time, money and space lay a strong foundation for turning the fantasy called ‘love’ into a reality?
***********************************************************************************
"It is a curious thought, but it is only when you see people looking ridiculous that you realize just how much you love them."
tiramisu
Tuesday, 12 December 2006
Thursday, 5 October 2006
Kanak
Aaj subah ka rang dekh kar muskarane ko jee chaha
Yeh subah jaise kaha rahi ho mujhse, meri sunhari kirnon mein khel kar to dekho
Man aakhir muskara hi utha
Jis cheez ki chaah thi woh haath se fisalti rahi
Jo haath mein tha uski kadr jaan-na baki tha abhi
Ab yeh suhani subah chhed rahi thi mere chanchal man ko,
Ae zindagi, tujhe jeene ki chaah mein, tera ek mazaak aur sahi
**************************************************************************************
"Wherever you go, no matter what the weather, always bring your own sunshine."
Yeh subah jaise kaha rahi ho mujhse, meri sunhari kirnon mein khel kar to dekho
Man aakhir muskara hi utha
Jis cheez ki chaah thi woh haath se fisalti rahi
Jo haath mein tha uski kadr jaan-na baki tha abhi
Ab yeh suhani subah chhed rahi thi mere chanchal man ko,
Ae zindagi, tujhe jeene ki chaah mein, tera ek mazaak aur sahi
**************************************************************************************
"Wherever you go, no matter what the weather, always bring your own sunshine."
Thursday, 7 September 2006
Men at Work
Heard this at work the other day:
"Different people climax at different times."
[The remark was made by a colleague in response to another colleague's innocent question: "Will the Ganesh Visarjan processions have reached their crescendo around this time? (8.00 pm IST, Wed, 6th Sep, Mumbai, India)]
**************************************************************************************
"Attitudes are contagious. Are yours worth catching?"
"Different people climax at different times."
[The remark was made by a colleague in response to another colleague's innocent question: "Will the Ganesh Visarjan processions have reached their crescendo around this time? (8.00 pm IST, Wed, 6th Sep, Mumbai, India)]
**************************************************************************************
"Attitudes are contagious. Are yours worth catching?"
Thursday, 31 August 2006
"I like blue!"
It had been a year to date. The pain had left her but the memory remained. The memory - not of the sight of his slow-moving silhouette, not of the smell of his shower gel after he had just showered, not of the touch of his fingers as he tapped her shoulder ever so gently as if he were worried that she might get disturbed from her reverie. It was the memory of his quiet voice, the sincerity of his words, the searching look in his eyes that sought her trust, her faith in him, her love, her heart.
Fate had been unkind to him but he had moved on, rediscovered a stronger person within himself. She admired his spirit. For the first time in her life she felt like believing in the old adage, 'love at first sight'... The battle between her mind and her heart raged underneath her calm demeanour. For the first time, her mind gave in. She wanted to believe in him, to care for him, to give him all that her heart was capable of giving. It was not too late, she thought, to start teaching herself to lose herself to somebody in this way.
His first gift to her was of the colour of the sea - as deep and unknowable as the sea. She embraced it with trembling fingers, curious and excited, nervous and afraid, but trusting and believing.
Today, she remembered him, his ways, his gifts, ... and the pain. He did not leave ... he fled, no, escaped. From her?... from himself... yes, from himself.
She watched the dark ocean waters on the evening tide as she stood near her bedroom window. They were a deep blue. Beautiful, she thought, love is beautiful. He had escaped, but she had not lost the courage to love.
************************************************************************************
"Promise me you'll never forget me because if I thought you would I'd never leave. "
Fate had been unkind to him but he had moved on, rediscovered a stronger person within himself. She admired his spirit. For the first time in her life she felt like believing in the old adage, 'love at first sight'... The battle between her mind and her heart raged underneath her calm demeanour. For the first time, her mind gave in. She wanted to believe in him, to care for him, to give him all that her heart was capable of giving. It was not too late, she thought, to start teaching herself to lose herself to somebody in this way.
His first gift to her was of the colour of the sea - as deep and unknowable as the sea. She embraced it with trembling fingers, curious and excited, nervous and afraid, but trusting and believing.
Today, she remembered him, his ways, his gifts, ... and the pain. He did not leave ... he fled, no, escaped. From her?... from himself... yes, from himself.
She watched the dark ocean waters on the evening tide as she stood near her bedroom window. They were a deep blue. Beautiful, she thought, love is beautiful. He had escaped, but she had not lost the courage to love.
************************************************************************************
"Promise me you'll never forget me because if I thought you would I'd never leave. "
Friday, 4 August 2006
If it makes me happy...
I've gone a whole month without a single post! What kept me busy?... Let's see...
There was work, with several late nights spent over perfecting the format of the presentation(s) to be made to my client;
there was the commute, with the variegated colours of human existence to watch out for on the way from my residence to the workplace;
there were the quiet weekends spent catching up with family over steaming cups of chai and self-made pakodas ...
enough and more of the regular stuff...
But there were many new experiences this past month, making it one of the more interesting times I've spent lately.
The current project team is the largest I've ever worked on. Keeping the team together and coordinated is such a big exercise in itself that my boss actually assigned that part of his job to me! Although I had learned at b-school what project management was about, I could never have been prepared for all that it could encompass.
The first realisation came when a colleague came to me with the complaint that he didn't have a rental car to go back home in... hmm... let's see now, I said, project management could involve logistics for the project team. Done, I will ensure that all team members have their transportation requirements taken care of.
Then a bunch of guys, looking very frustrated at having being locked out of the office for twenty minutes, approached me and pronounced in unison, "Our Access Cards do not work!" Wow! How could my team work if they were not allowed into the workplace?! I took it upon myself to escalate the issue.
An intern from a foreign land had been on the project team for a couple of months. He admitted to me, over dinner one evening, that he identifies with all that is rebellious in nature, but wanted to conform as far as possible in this new country with all its peculiar sensitivities. I quite like the guy. He was especially having trouble relating to some uptight members of the client team. Knowing that I had spent long enough in the world of work, he came to me for advice. Along with a patient hearing, I offered him the much-needed "advice". From then on, my cabin has been designated as the "HR" (for Human Resources) room. Another facet of project management?... I guess...
The other day the boss asked me how the team was doing... what? Well, you know, how is the morale of the team, and such. Umm... I took a little longer to reply than was expected. "Hey, why don't you organise some team events for the whole lot?" Huh? All right, I suppose project management does involve ensuring high levels of productivity for the team, which includes giving them a breather and a chance to bond with their colleagues informally. So now, in addition to being the Logistics Officer, the Admin-in-charge and the Chief HR Officer, I am also the Chief Entertainment Officer for the project team!
Fortunately for me, there were enough instances to ensure a boost in my self-confidence along with the expansion of my portfolio.
Another intern from a foreign land was planning a holiday with some personal friends and family. He insisted that I join the company 'cause he wanted to let them know how much fun some of the people he worked with were! Everyone likes to be popular but I was quite taken aback by the sincerity with which he asked; quite touched too that he felt like I made him feel at home and looked after. [Actually, another colleague almost warned me that I might be getting too motherly about my team members... am not yet sure how to respond to that...hmm]
One of the girls on the team (a very small no.) has almost embarrassed me with the no. of compliments she has sent my way. She likes my wardrobe, she says, and the way I use it. Now that's something a girl should feel good about! :)
A junior colleague had one drink too many on one of those after-parties following a team dinner. He had acquired a sombre expression and had been waxing eloquent for a few minutes on the meaning of life. At one point in his soliloquy, he fixed his gaze on me and said solemnly, "One day I will write a book on you." Where did that come from?! "You are a perfectionist but an unassuming one, how do you manage it?" I'm still wondering about the nuances of that statement. It certainly massages my ego that anyone should want to emulate me but I worry just a little of appearing unreachable... not so perfect, after all, ... and thank God for that!
On reflection, I'm glad that project management has not consumed me completely. I finally put into action a long overdue item on my 'To Do' list: taking my salsa lessons! It's great getting back to dancing again. And I can't wait for the jazz lessons that are beginning next month.
It's been an eventful month in all. I'm enjoying feeling good about being myself, stretching myself. All right, with all the air that's quickly filling up my head, I might start levitating soon. Time to call it a post. :)
************************************************************************************
"You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams."
There was work, with several late nights spent over perfecting the format of the presentation(s) to be made to my client;
there was the commute, with the variegated colours of human existence to watch out for on the way from my residence to the workplace;
there were the quiet weekends spent catching up with family over steaming cups of chai and self-made pakodas ...
enough and more of the regular stuff...
But there were many new experiences this past month, making it one of the more interesting times I've spent lately.
The current project team is the largest I've ever worked on. Keeping the team together and coordinated is such a big exercise in itself that my boss actually assigned that part of his job to me! Although I had learned at b-school what project management was about, I could never have been prepared for all that it could encompass.
The first realisation came when a colleague came to me with the complaint that he didn't have a rental car to go back home in... hmm... let's see now, I said, project management could involve logistics for the project team. Done, I will ensure that all team members have their transportation requirements taken care of.
Then a bunch of guys, looking very frustrated at having being locked out of the office for twenty minutes, approached me and pronounced in unison, "Our Access Cards do not work!" Wow! How could my team work if they were not allowed into the workplace?! I took it upon myself to escalate the issue.
An intern from a foreign land had been on the project team for a couple of months. He admitted to me, over dinner one evening, that he identifies with all that is rebellious in nature, but wanted to conform as far as possible in this new country with all its peculiar sensitivities. I quite like the guy. He was especially having trouble relating to some uptight members of the client team. Knowing that I had spent long enough in the world of work, he came to me for advice. Along with a patient hearing, I offered him the much-needed "advice". From then on, my cabin has been designated as the "HR" (for Human Resources) room. Another facet of project management?... I guess...
The other day the boss asked me how the team was doing... what? Well, you know, how is the morale of the team, and such. Umm... I took a little longer to reply than was expected. "Hey, why don't you organise some team events for the whole lot?" Huh? All right, I suppose project management does involve ensuring high levels of productivity for the team, which includes giving them a breather and a chance to bond with their colleagues informally. So now, in addition to being the Logistics Officer, the Admin-in-charge and the Chief HR Officer, I am also the Chief Entertainment Officer for the project team!
Fortunately for me, there were enough instances to ensure a boost in my self-confidence along with the expansion of my portfolio.
Another intern from a foreign land was planning a holiday with some personal friends and family. He insisted that I join the company 'cause he wanted to let them know how much fun some of the people he worked with were! Everyone likes to be popular but I was quite taken aback by the sincerity with which he asked; quite touched too that he felt like I made him feel at home and looked after. [Actually, another colleague almost warned me that I might be getting too motherly about my team members... am not yet sure how to respond to that...hmm]
One of the girls on the team (a very small no.) has almost embarrassed me with the no. of compliments she has sent my way. She likes my wardrobe, she says, and the way I use it. Now that's something a girl should feel good about! :)
A junior colleague had one drink too many on one of those after-parties following a team dinner. He had acquired a sombre expression and had been waxing eloquent for a few minutes on the meaning of life. At one point in his soliloquy, he fixed his gaze on me and said solemnly, "One day I will write a book on you." Where did that come from?! "You are a perfectionist but an unassuming one, how do you manage it?" I'm still wondering about the nuances of that statement. It certainly massages my ego that anyone should want to emulate me but I worry just a little of appearing unreachable... not so perfect, after all, ... and thank God for that!
On reflection, I'm glad that project management has not consumed me completely. I finally put into action a long overdue item on my 'To Do' list: taking my salsa lessons! It's great getting back to dancing again. And I can't wait for the jazz lessons that are beginning next month.
It's been an eventful month in all. I'm enjoying feeling good about being myself, stretching myself. All right, with all the air that's quickly filling up my head, I might start levitating soon. Time to call it a post. :)
************************************************************************************
"You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams."
Wednesday, 14 June 2006
Voulez vous danser avec moi ce soir?
"Dance with me?"
The question was apparent but only
in the anticipation of his extended hand. I hesitated.
"I don't know how," the confused excitement
in my eyes seemed to say. He persisted.
"I'll show you ."
Slowly I brought my hand to meet his
and felt a tingle in my fingernails. He elevated
me and we moved to the dance floor,
the sole performers for the evening, my nerves agitated.
"Come closer."
I misunderstood and stepped
on his toes, making him jump. I was mortified.
He covered up for my faux pas,
quickly aligning himself to my misguided efforts, chivalry personified.
"What if I can't?"
"You can. Trust me,
I'll teach you." He tried
to calm my nerves. "What if I step on your toes again?"
"I'll not wince once, they are yours to tread." I was mystified.
"What if I can't hold on?"
"I'll pull the weight, for both of us,"
his voice was steady, his gaze keen. I was assured,
somewhat. "What if I hold too tight?"
"I'll remove your fear and hold you closer. You are secured."
"And if I can't keep up?"
"I'll wait for you, so you can adjust
your pace. Do you always ask so many questions?" he smiled.
"I'm nervous. What if I move too fast?"
"I'll catch up, so you are never lonely." A promise filed.
"After the prelude,"
He warned me to get into motion
as he held my hand. On the count of two, we moved.
The pounding in my heart became louder and began to subside
as he led me swiftly across the floor. A good dancer, he proved.
"See, you are doing fine,"
he beamed approvingly at my disjointed routine.
"You are too generous," I blushed as the music box belted
out a lilting tune from long ago. "I mean it, I couldn't
have asked for a nimbler partner." My heart melted.
"There's one thing though,"
he interjected my wafting thoughts. The glint in his eye
should have alerted me but I breathed
so rapidly that he steadied me with his arms, while in my heart
a flutter of emotions, dark (and fair), seethed.
"My turn to ask questions,"
he whispered in my ear, his breath warm like a blanket
around my shoulders. "Will you be my partner?... forever?" I sighed,
the flutter was now in my stomach, "hmm... I need some time to think." His face fell.
"But I could answer sooner if you...," I waited for him to look up, "... kiss me." He gladly complied.
Copyright (C) Meeta
************************************************************************************
"If you wish to be loved, love."
The question was apparent but only
in the anticipation of his extended hand. I hesitated.
"I don't know how," the confused excitement
in my eyes seemed to say. He persisted.
"I'll show you ."
Slowly I brought my hand to meet his
and felt a tingle in my fingernails. He elevated
me and we moved to the dance floor,
the sole performers for the evening, my nerves agitated.
"Come closer."
I misunderstood and stepped
on his toes, making him jump. I was mortified.
He covered up for my faux pas,
quickly aligning himself to my misguided efforts, chivalry personified.
"What if I can't?"
"You can. Trust me,
I'll teach you." He tried
to calm my nerves. "What if I step on your toes again?"
"I'll not wince once, they are yours to tread." I was mystified.
"What if I can't hold on?"
"I'll pull the weight, for both of us,"
his voice was steady, his gaze keen. I was assured,
somewhat. "What if I hold too tight?"
"I'll remove your fear and hold you closer. You are secured."
"And if I can't keep up?"
"I'll wait for you, so you can adjust
your pace. Do you always ask so many questions?" he smiled.
"I'm nervous. What if I move too fast?"
"I'll catch up, so you are never lonely." A promise filed.
"After the prelude,"
He warned me to get into motion
as he held my hand. On the count of two, we moved.
The pounding in my heart became louder and began to subside
as he led me swiftly across the floor. A good dancer, he proved.
"See, you are doing fine,"
he beamed approvingly at my disjointed routine.
"You are too generous," I blushed as the music box belted
out a lilting tune from long ago. "I mean it, I couldn't
have asked for a nimbler partner." My heart melted.
"There's one thing though,"
he interjected my wafting thoughts. The glint in his eye
should have alerted me but I breathed
so rapidly that he steadied me with his arms, while in my heart
a flutter of emotions, dark (and fair), seethed.
"My turn to ask questions,"
he whispered in my ear, his breath warm like a blanket
around my shoulders. "Will you be my partner?... forever?" I sighed,
the flutter was now in my stomach, "hmm... I need some time to think." His face fell.
"But I could answer sooner if you...," I waited for him to look up, "... kiss me." He gladly complied.
Copyright (C) Meeta
************************************************************************************
"If you wish to be loved, love."
Sunday, 4 June 2006
Back to school - Flashback - Part II
[Another post from a bygone era.]
9th November 2003
Here's some more of my narcissistic self flooding your mailboxes yet again! All those who've written/ called, it's been lovely to hear from u. It's always nice to catch up with friends and family, so please do keep writing/ calling.
Thought I'd tell u a bit about school and college here at Oxford (yeah, isn't it funny how I'm at school and in college at the same time?!)
The Said Business School got a whole new building to give it a face in 2001, so u can imagine that the building is still quite new. Although the business school does not have a 'campus' as such, we do have a lot of space to play with (you know how the Brits like to have things ... luxuriously spread out!). So the premises occupy about as much space as three times St. Xavier's College in Mumbai with all its addenda.
The facility has a 350-seater auditorium/ lecture-theatre, 4 mid-sized lecture halls (seating about 110 each), the library on two floors (with a "Pin-drop silence" section on the upper level), several seminar rooms of varying sizes for discussions, receptions and company presentations, an open-air mini-stadium (minus the track), a Common Room, laid out in a semi-circular fashion with glass on the curved perimeter, that doubles as the cafetaria during breaks and the Happy Hour,and the offices of the faculty, etc.
The faculty are excellent, every one of them. The Managerial Economics guy is an Israeli who is doing his research on e-commerce. I think he could very well have taken up modelling for a career and made a ton of money from it. Such a chiselled face and such a charming disposition as one rarely gets to see in middle-aged men these days...
The OB guy (there's a gal too later in the term...oops, from the coming week actually!... the term is too short to think of it in terms of now and later) is the only one who dresses casual to class. Organisational Behaviour is just a series of one inspiring and enlightening story after another. For me, I think, the experience at my last job really prepared me well to look out for hygiene/ motivation factors in the case studies I'm doing now.
The Financial Reporting (basically Accounts) fella is a laugh riot, a Japanese with Suzuki for a last name, who makes the class more interesting with his simple Jap humour than anyone with excellent pedantic abilities could have done.
The Finance guy, a Brit, is as Brit as a Brit prof could be, quick-talking, precise, with an ever-so-subtle sense of humour. He does a great job of a course that is definitely not the easiest to teach in eight weeks. We just unearthed the CAPM (Capital Asset Pricing Model) in the last two classes, and I can confidently say that I feel 'very' knowledgeable now!
The Decision Science guy, the youngest of the lot (just 34, though he could pass off as a 25-yr-old) would have been a comedian in Italian theatre circles if he hadn't decided to make Statistics his source of livelihood. He's the cutest Brit I've seen ever since I stepped foot in this country! I had a crush on him at first sight!! But, alas, the shimmering gold band on his finger razed all my hopes to the ground :( ... ;))
The Strategy prof is amazing! Another Brit, with a not-so-Brit sense of humour, he makes the class an event in itself. It's impossible to switch off for even a minute during those 3 hrs (of course, another good reason would be his good looks ;)... I'm seriously beginning to think now that men become more appealing as they near their 40s... You may get to read some of his literature in the Business Standard. Alas, another guy is stepping in from the coming week, an American, I hear. At the end of the last class, we were all so overwhelmed at the thought of not having him lecture us anymore that we gave him a standing ovation. (sob, sob...)
Hey, you know me, there's usually something still left after the last best thing - something even better! To give u some background, I was reading an excellent management book a few months ago, in June I think, the international bestseller called 'In Search of Excellence'. I was rather impressed by the book. Little had I known then that I would get the chance to meet a co-author of the book in person just a few months hence!
Tom Peters was here to give us a talk, during the UK launch of his to-be-bestseller 'Re-imagine', and what a talk it was!! I'm sure that there was not one person among the 300 odd who attended the talk that evening who was not shaken up after those 30 stimulating minutes! An orator par excellence, he's really much younger at heart, in mind and in laryngeal ability, than his 58 years make him appear. He gave us a lot of good news - the future of the global economy will be driven by India and China as far as geographies go, and by women as far as demographies go. I'm extremely enthused that I have membership of both the groups! (chip on shoulder and all... ahem)
Well, that's a whole lot of verbal diarrhoea from my side. Here is a picture from the Matriculation that I recently attended. Matriculation is actually the ceremony whereby a student formally becomes a member of the Oxford University. Cambridge is the only other place to have this tradition. The weird robe we are wearing is called an Advanced Graduate Gown. Among formal ceremonies, it is worn only on the days of matriculation and graduation. Otherwise, we are required to wear it for dinner in the College Hall (the dining hall, i.e.), and during our exams, one of those Oxonian traditions that go on for no particular logical reason. hmm...
Hear soon, all.
************************************************************************************
"Many things in life are lost just for the want of asking."
9th November 2003
Here's some more of my narcissistic self flooding your mailboxes yet again! All those who've written/ called, it's been lovely to hear from u. It's always nice to catch up with friends and family, so please do keep writing/ calling.
Thought I'd tell u a bit about school and college here at Oxford (yeah, isn't it funny how I'm at school and in college at the same time?!)
The Said Business School got a whole new building to give it a face in 2001, so u can imagine that the building is still quite new. Although the business school does not have a 'campus' as such, we do have a lot of space to play with (you know how the Brits like to have things ... luxuriously spread out!). So the premises occupy about as much space as three times St. Xavier's College in Mumbai with all its addenda.
The facility has a 350-seater auditorium/ lecture-theatre, 4 mid-sized lecture halls (seating about 110 each), the library on two floors (with a "Pin-drop silence" section on the upper level), several seminar rooms of varying sizes for discussions, receptions and company presentations, an open-air mini-stadium (minus the track), a Common Room, laid out in a semi-circular fashion with glass on the curved perimeter, that doubles as the cafetaria during breaks and the Happy Hour,and the offices of the faculty, etc.
The faculty are excellent, every one of them. The Managerial Economics guy is an Israeli who is doing his research on e-commerce. I think he could very well have taken up modelling for a career and made a ton of money from it. Such a chiselled face and such a charming disposition as one rarely gets to see in middle-aged men these days...
The OB guy (there's a gal too later in the term...oops, from the coming week actually!... the term is too short to think of it in terms of now and later) is the only one who dresses casual to class. Organisational Behaviour is just a series of one inspiring and enlightening story after another. For me, I think, the experience at my last job really prepared me well to look out for hygiene/ motivation factors in the case studies I'm doing now.
The Financial Reporting (basically Accounts) fella is a laugh riot, a Japanese with Suzuki for a last name, who makes the class more interesting with his simple Jap humour than anyone with excellent pedantic abilities could have done.
The Finance guy, a Brit, is as Brit as a Brit prof could be, quick-talking, precise, with an ever-so-subtle sense of humour. He does a great job of a course that is definitely not the easiest to teach in eight weeks. We just unearthed the CAPM (Capital Asset Pricing Model) in the last two classes, and I can confidently say that I feel 'very' knowledgeable now!
The Decision Science guy, the youngest of the lot (just 34, though he could pass off as a 25-yr-old) would have been a comedian in Italian theatre circles if he hadn't decided to make Statistics his source of livelihood. He's the cutest Brit I've seen ever since I stepped foot in this country! I had a crush on him at first sight!! But, alas, the shimmering gold band on his finger razed all my hopes to the ground :( ... ;))
The Strategy prof is amazing! Another Brit, with a not-so-Brit sense of humour, he makes the class an event in itself. It's impossible to switch off for even a minute during those 3 hrs (of course, another good reason would be his good looks ;)... I'm seriously beginning to think now that men become more appealing as they near their 40s... You may get to read some of his literature in the Business Standard. Alas, another guy is stepping in from the coming week, an American, I hear. At the end of the last class, we were all so overwhelmed at the thought of not having him lecture us anymore that we gave him a standing ovation. (sob, sob...)
Hey, you know me, there's usually something still left after the last best thing - something even better! To give u some background, I was reading an excellent management book a few months ago, in June I think, the international bestseller called 'In Search of Excellence'. I was rather impressed by the book. Little had I known then that I would get the chance to meet a co-author of the book in person just a few months hence!
Tom Peters was here to give us a talk, during the UK launch of his to-be-bestseller 'Re-imagine', and what a talk it was!! I'm sure that there was not one person among the 300 odd who attended the talk that evening who was not shaken up after those 30 stimulating minutes! An orator par excellence, he's really much younger at heart, in mind and in laryngeal ability, than his 58 years make him appear. He gave us a lot of good news - the future of the global economy will be driven by India and China as far as geographies go, and by women as far as demographies go. I'm extremely enthused that I have membership of both the groups! (chip on shoulder and all... ahem)
Well, that's a whole lot of verbal diarrhoea from my side. Here is a picture from the Matriculation that I recently attended. Matriculation is actually the ceremony whereby a student formally becomes a member of the Oxford University. Cambridge is the only other place to have this tradition. The weird robe we are wearing is called an Advanced Graduate Gown. Among formal ceremonies, it is worn only on the days of matriculation and graduation. Otherwise, we are required to wear it for dinner in the College Hall (the dining hall, i.e.), and during our exams, one of those Oxonian traditions that go on for no particular logical reason. hmm...Hear soon, all.
************************************************************************************
"Many things in life are lost just for the want of asking."
Tuesday, 16 May 2006
My heart will go on - Flashback - Part I
[The next series of posts is dedicated to one of best periods of my life - the time that I spent away from the people that mean so much to me only to learn that so many more would soon be added to my circle of friends, all in the process of getting an education. And what an education it was! What will follow is a string of episodic emails written to a privileged lot. Backward ho, to 2003!]
Milestones...
The morning of the 28th of Sep 2003 - the beginning of a day when my whole world would change ... literally. I awoke at 4 am from a fitful sleep that lasted less than 4 hrs. Had hardly had time to spend too many precious moments with my family. But I was unusually calm, as if I was preparing to go to work. Had stopped worrying about packing and baggage weight issues, which had hounded me in the previous few weeks.
The cabbie was prompt - arrived at 5 am sharp. We (family and I) left for the Mumbai International Airport at 5.30 am. The drive was peaceful, got some time to finally chat with little sis who had just arrived from Pune, where she studies, the eve before. She always helps keep my spirits up. :)
Arrived at the airport at 6.15 am. The place seemed pretty crowded even at that hour. So whats new for Bombayites?! Found the right queue to check-in my luggage - obviously the longest of all!
By 7.30 am had finished with the checking-in. Felt a little nervous, a little apprehensive, and a little excited all at once! I rushed to see family one last time before leaving. I could see my emotions mirrored in their eyes.
A friend called to say goodbye yet again ... oh, I hate goodbyes ... am going to erase that word from my dictionary!
Saw a familiar face - we'd met at the interview for scholarship! Recognition flickered in his eyes too. We quickly exchanged names and got back to our respective families, with promises to catch up on the plane (we were on the same flight).
Spotted another friend quietly watching from outside the glass enclosure ... bid him come in ... felt the intensity of unspoken homesickness yet again.
Well, itwas time to go ahead on the journey ... alone.The Immigration check took longer than I expected. I was glad for that ... it let me look at those loving pairs of eyes a while longer. A final wave and they were out of sight. ... I let the excitement take over.
After another round of checks, I was finally in the exit lounge. The wait before boarding intensified my awareness of the surroundings. A girl I'd befriended during the wait for baggage-check-in joined me. We exchanged notes on what I could expect on landing.
Soon the flight was announced and the entourage in the lounge moved to Gate 18. My first trip outside the Indian subcontinent was soon about to begin! Being a novice flyer (is there a word like that?!), I was quite impressed by theway the aircraft was so perfectly aligned to the exit as to allow a smooth walk-in to the plane. Realised later that aero-bridges are quite common anyway.
My seat was located in the middle of the plane, between two uncles, one of whom seemed to be asleep even as he took his seat, and the other of whom, a haggard old man, who seemed too desperate to make a conversation when not trying to lean entirely on my side of the seat. I ignored both.
The 0925 hrs AI flight took off at exactly 0949 hrs. I ensured I visited the loo before that so as not to disturb the sleepy uncle on the aisle seat after take-off - my first visit to a loo in a plane! ;)
I hadn't yet located the two guys who were to be my companions on the flight to London. After breakfast I would take a round or two to find them, I thought. Breakfast arrived at 1030. I'm sticking to vegetarian food for sometime ... plus, its Navratri. No comments on the food, of course. International standards are only meant for mention in the brochures... tsk-tsk.
"M?" ... a familiar voice, not a familiar face. Ah! Here was one of those two companions. My quest was half over. We set out on the round to look for the third member of the Oxford party. After four rounds of avoiding stray legs in the aisle, stepping on a few toes, and causing some grief to the air hostesses, we concluded that the elusive character had not boarded the plane at all! Well, who's John Galt?!
It was only 1100 hrs ... we still had another eight hrs to go. No problem - the aircraft, so many thousand feet above the ground, is much more stable in air than our Bombay local trains are on the tracks. We occupied one of the service areas in the plane and exchanged notes on our missing friend, the grievances on weight limits, the content of our baggage, the expected weather, the impending hardwork/ smart work, ways to make money ranging from the sophisticated to the devious methods, and jokes on our false sense of self-dependence. Of course, we caused much more grief to the flight-pursers this time - we had been on their territory for more than three hours! ... almost forgot to mention - we missed the screening of the film Armaan during this small chat! ;)
Caught up with the "scholarship" acquaintance, as I'd promised, on the way back from another trip to the holy place. He will be in London and is more apprehensive than I am about being in a new city ... a new country. So, offered him some moral support and the chance to join our two-member team on the way out of the Heathrow airport. The conversation proved useful as his neighbour happened to be a current student at UChicago GSB's MBA programme. (Btw, the flight was Bangalore-Mumbai-London-Chicago). An enthusiastic software engineer working with Motorola at their HQ.
We broke up (the conversation) because we were expecting to be served lunch. But lunch was apparently an hour away. Attempted to listen to/ watch the TV in the meanwhile. Put on the headphones and voila! Here was one of my favourite songs! Air India's Bollywood Hits - not too bad, I say. Hummed along with Tu hi dil hai (J-beats).
Lunch was worse than breakfast as if there are no better veggies in the market than ladyfinger and brinjal!
Thought I should catch up on some sleep after lunchbut sleep eluded me, so brought out my pad and began writing. It is 1735 hrs IST just now and the latest screen just flashed that we are 57 minutes away from the destination! (Cant believe it'll be over so soon!) So long ... aage ki kahani Oxford pahunchne ke baad! (The story would continue after I get to Oxford.)
30th Sep 2003
The plane touched the ground that afternoon at exactly 1837 hrs IST or 1407 hrs BST. At last I was there! London looks beautiful from up above. Got a wonderful glimpse of the Thames. Almost felt like a scene from the movies!
I was lucky to get a ride in the spacious car of my companion's friend, who had come to receive him at the airport. He was kind enough to drive us all the way to Oxford. The countryside was beautiful.
An hour later we were in Oxford - the place that would be my residence for the coming year. We took some time finding Keble College, to which we are affiliated. The streets are well marked so we were there before long. The person at the reception (the Porter's Lodge, as it is called), Ken, was most helpful in giving us access to our rooms.
My room, in one of the newly-built buildings in the College, was quite a pleasant surprise - a neat skylight letting in sunlight, a wardrobe, a full-length mirror, a huge deskspace with drawers and a swivel chair, a small coffee table with a chair, and a well-equipped bed, mattress, bedsheets, pillows, duvet and all! But that was not all, the bathroom with a shower that can be adjusted to any temperature was fully ready to use with basic toiletries in place. The kitchenette had/has a refrigerator, a microwave, an electric stove and basic utensils, cutlery and crockery. I was happy with the thought of living in 3-star luxury for the year.
2nd Oct 2003
My friend left for London with his friend the day we arrived, while I got myself a phone card to make the first call home. Mom and Dad seemed to have been right beside the phone. Could make out the relief and happiness in their voices.
Spent that first evening getting essentials out of the baggage. Ate something, showered and got ready for bed. I think I went through mixed feelings that night. But I must've slept well as I was fresh for the next day.
Had an appointment at the Bank so got ready quickly and set out to find the place. The best thing about Oxford is that everything is within walking distance! Got myself a map and went about looking for the right direction. The people on the street were rather helpful and I was there in no time. Almost felt as if everybody on the street knew that I was new there. But the that changed when I was asked by a couple of folks for directions!! Can u believe that? Of course, I was just about acquainted with the map to give them the correct information. ;)
Went shopping for edible essentials at the Supermarket on my way back. Forced myself not to convert to INR when it was time to pay the bill. :( I did anyway... INR 690.00 for a loaf for bread, a bottle of sandwich spread, packets of salt & sugar, a jar of milk, tea leaves, a pack of biscuits, and a bowl of fruit.)
The room seemed too quiet when I returned ... not that Oxford is very noisy otherwise. But I was missing the sound, feeling of people around. Wanted to share the day's experience with someone. An impulse directed me to use the phone card again. Felt great speaking to Mom. Spent the evening unpacking, had an early dinner and went to bed. Slept reeeeally well - about twelve hours. The next day looked brighter.
My classmate-to-be, the one from the flight, moved in that day and I was glad for the company. We were happy to be informed that our friend, the third member of the party, had finally arrived. We went to his place, closer to the b-school, and cooked a very elementary meal at the common kitchen (Indian food without any masalas ... :( ...)
The next day i.e. yesterday, was spent on market research for cell-phones and laptops, while we visited the b-school and recognised the many lovely scenes we had seen in the brochures. The biggest achievement of the day - I got my laptop!!! Haven't been able to get off it ever since. ;) My purse is exponentially lighter than it was before the purchase but I'm happy with the buy. You can probably see that from the length of this monologue! ;)
So much for now. Have spent the whole of Gandhi Jayanti exploring my laptop and further researching mobile phone options. The next week will be devoted to induction at the b-school and thenceforth the action promises to be thick. So am enjoying the last few days of vacation!
Will keep in touch as much as possible. Hope to hear from u all too, regularly. Let distances not come between minds and hearts.
************************************************************************************
"Don't go through life so fast that someone has to throw a brick at you to get your attention!"
Milestones...
The morning of the 28th of Sep 2003 - the beginning of a day when my whole world would change ... literally. I awoke at 4 am from a fitful sleep that lasted less than 4 hrs. Had hardly had time to spend too many precious moments with my family. But I was unusually calm, as if I was preparing to go to work. Had stopped worrying about packing and baggage weight issues, which had hounded me in the previous few weeks.
The cabbie was prompt - arrived at 5 am sharp. We (family and I) left for the Mumbai International Airport at 5.30 am. The drive was peaceful, got some time to finally chat with little sis who had just arrived from Pune, where she studies, the eve before. She always helps keep my spirits up. :)
Arrived at the airport at 6.15 am. The place seemed pretty crowded even at that hour. So whats new for Bombayites?! Found the right queue to check-in my luggage - obviously the longest of all!
By 7.30 am had finished with the checking-in. Felt a little nervous, a little apprehensive, and a little excited all at once! I rushed to see family one last time before leaving. I could see my emotions mirrored in their eyes.
A friend called to say goodbye yet again ... oh, I hate goodbyes ... am going to erase that word from my dictionary!
Saw a familiar face - we'd met at the interview for scholarship! Recognition flickered in his eyes too. We quickly exchanged names and got back to our respective families, with promises to catch up on the plane (we were on the same flight).
Spotted another friend quietly watching from outside the glass enclosure ... bid him come in ... felt the intensity of unspoken homesickness yet again.
Well, itwas time to go ahead on the journey ... alone.The Immigration check took longer than I expected. I was glad for that ... it let me look at those loving pairs of eyes a while longer. A final wave and they were out of sight. ... I let the excitement take over.
After another round of checks, I was finally in the exit lounge. The wait before boarding intensified my awareness of the surroundings. A girl I'd befriended during the wait for baggage-check-in joined me. We exchanged notes on what I could expect on landing.
Soon the flight was announced and the entourage in the lounge moved to Gate 18. My first trip outside the Indian subcontinent was soon about to begin! Being a novice flyer (is there a word like that?!), I was quite impressed by theway the aircraft was so perfectly aligned to the exit as to allow a smooth walk-in to the plane. Realised later that aero-bridges are quite common anyway.
My seat was located in the middle of the plane, between two uncles, one of whom seemed to be asleep even as he took his seat, and the other of whom, a haggard old man, who seemed too desperate to make a conversation when not trying to lean entirely on my side of the seat. I ignored both.
The 0925 hrs AI flight took off at exactly 0949 hrs. I ensured I visited the loo before that so as not to disturb the sleepy uncle on the aisle seat after take-off - my first visit to a loo in a plane! ;)
I hadn't yet located the two guys who were to be my companions on the flight to London. After breakfast I would take a round or two to find them, I thought. Breakfast arrived at 1030. I'm sticking to vegetarian food for sometime ... plus, its Navratri. No comments on the food, of course. International standards are only meant for mention in the brochures... tsk-tsk.
"M?" ... a familiar voice, not a familiar face. Ah! Here was one of those two companions. My quest was half over. We set out on the round to look for the third member of the Oxford party. After four rounds of avoiding stray legs in the aisle, stepping on a few toes, and causing some grief to the air hostesses, we concluded that the elusive character had not boarded the plane at all! Well, who's John Galt?!
It was only 1100 hrs ... we still had another eight hrs to go. No problem - the aircraft, so many thousand feet above the ground, is much more stable in air than our Bombay local trains are on the tracks. We occupied one of the service areas in the plane and exchanged notes on our missing friend, the grievances on weight limits, the content of our baggage, the expected weather, the impending hardwork/ smart work, ways to make money ranging from the sophisticated to the devious methods, and jokes on our false sense of self-dependence. Of course, we caused much more grief to the flight-pursers this time - we had been on their territory for more than three hours! ... almost forgot to mention - we missed the screening of the film Armaan during this small chat! ;)
Caught up with the "scholarship" acquaintance, as I'd promised, on the way back from another trip to the holy place. He will be in London and is more apprehensive than I am about being in a new city ... a new country. So, offered him some moral support and the chance to join our two-member team on the way out of the Heathrow airport. The conversation proved useful as his neighbour happened to be a current student at UChicago GSB's MBA programme. (Btw, the flight was Bangalore-Mumbai-London-Chicago). An enthusiastic software engineer working with Motorola at their HQ.
We broke up (the conversation) because we were expecting to be served lunch. But lunch was apparently an hour away. Attempted to listen to/ watch the TV in the meanwhile. Put on the headphones and voila! Here was one of my favourite songs! Air India's Bollywood Hits - not too bad, I say. Hummed along with Tu hi dil hai (J-beats).
Lunch was worse than breakfast as if there are no better veggies in the market than ladyfinger and brinjal!
Thought I should catch up on some sleep after lunchbut sleep eluded me, so brought out my pad and began writing. It is 1735 hrs IST just now and the latest screen just flashed that we are 57 minutes away from the destination! (Cant believe it'll be over so soon!) So long ... aage ki kahani Oxford pahunchne ke baad! (The story would continue after I get to Oxford.)
30th Sep 2003
The plane touched the ground that afternoon at exactly 1837 hrs IST or 1407 hrs BST. At last I was there! London looks beautiful from up above. Got a wonderful glimpse of the Thames. Almost felt like a scene from the movies!
I was lucky to get a ride in the spacious car of my companion's friend, who had come to receive him at the airport. He was kind enough to drive us all the way to Oxford. The countryside was beautiful.
An hour later we were in Oxford - the place that would be my residence for the coming year. We took some time finding Keble College, to which we are affiliated. The streets are well marked so we were there before long. The person at the reception (the Porter's Lodge, as it is called), Ken, was most helpful in giving us access to our rooms.
My room, in one of the newly-built buildings in the College, was quite a pleasant surprise - a neat skylight letting in sunlight, a wardrobe, a full-length mirror, a huge deskspace with drawers and a swivel chair, a small coffee table with a chair, and a well-equipped bed, mattress, bedsheets, pillows, duvet and all! But that was not all, the bathroom with a shower that can be adjusted to any temperature was fully ready to use with basic toiletries in place. The kitchenette had/has a refrigerator, a microwave, an electric stove and basic utensils, cutlery and crockery. I was happy with the thought of living in 3-star luxury for the year.
2nd Oct 2003
My friend left for London with his friend the day we arrived, while I got myself a phone card to make the first call home. Mom and Dad seemed to have been right beside the phone. Could make out the relief and happiness in their voices.
Spent that first evening getting essentials out of the baggage. Ate something, showered and got ready for bed. I think I went through mixed feelings that night. But I must've slept well as I was fresh for the next day.
Had an appointment at the Bank so got ready quickly and set out to find the place. The best thing about Oxford is that everything is within walking distance! Got myself a map and went about looking for the right direction. The people on the street were rather helpful and I was there in no time. Almost felt as if everybody on the street knew that I was new there. But the that changed when I was asked by a couple of folks for directions!! Can u believe that? Of course, I was just about acquainted with the map to give them the correct information. ;)
Went shopping for edible essentials at the Supermarket on my way back. Forced myself not to convert to INR when it was time to pay the bill. :( I did anyway... INR 690.00 for a loaf for bread, a bottle of sandwich spread, packets of salt & sugar, a jar of milk, tea leaves, a pack of biscuits, and a bowl of fruit.)
The room seemed too quiet when I returned ... not that Oxford is very noisy otherwise. But I was missing the sound, feeling of people around. Wanted to share the day's experience with someone. An impulse directed me to use the phone card again. Felt great speaking to Mom. Spent the evening unpacking, had an early dinner and went to bed. Slept reeeeally well - about twelve hours. The next day looked brighter.
My classmate-to-be, the one from the flight, moved in that day and I was glad for the company. We were happy to be informed that our friend, the third member of the party, had finally arrived. We went to his place, closer to the b-school, and cooked a very elementary meal at the common kitchen (Indian food without any masalas ... :( ...)
The next day i.e. yesterday, was spent on market research for cell-phones and laptops, while we visited the b-school and recognised the many lovely scenes we had seen in the brochures. The biggest achievement of the day - I got my laptop!!! Haven't been able to get off it ever since. ;) My purse is exponentially lighter than it was before the purchase but I'm happy with the buy. You can probably see that from the length of this monologue! ;)
So much for now. Have spent the whole of Gandhi Jayanti exploring my laptop and further researching mobile phone options. The next week will be devoted to induction at the b-school and thenceforth the action promises to be thick. So am enjoying the last few days of vacation!
Will keep in touch as much as possible. Hope to hear from u all too, regularly. Let distances not come between minds and hearts.
************************************************************************************
"Don't go through life so fast that someone has to throw a brick at you to get your attention!"
Tuesday, 2 May 2006
Femme française dans les Emirats
Dix choses que j'aime au sujet des hommes:
Un:
La manière au coeur d'un homme est par son estomac. Un repas gentil les entre dans une bonne humeur.
Deux:
La manière ils prennent vos sacs lourds, valises de sorte que vous ne deviez pas porter le poids.
Trois:
La manière ils repoussent les cheveux qui tombent sur votre visage.
Quatre:
La manière ils arrangent une partie impromptue de dîner quand vous avez eu un jour dur juste pour vous encourager.
Cinq:
La manière ils vous apportent des chocolats quand ils savent que vous avez été seul toute la journée.
Six:
La manière ils faites des plaisanteries idiotes juste pour vous faire le sourire quand vous avez des larmes dans vos yeux.
Sept:
La manière ils portent toujours un mouchoir propre pour vous donner au cas où vous commenceriez à pleurer.
Huit:
La manière ils recherchent de petites raisons de prolonger la conversation de dîner de sorte que vous puissiez être ensemble pour plus longtemps.
Neuf:
La manière ils font des excuses pour éviter une date juste pour pouvoir observer un match de football sans vous gêner.
Dix:
La manière qu'ils feignent pour être de grands chefs quand vous vous plaignez au sujet de leur ne pas aider dans la cuisine.
************************************************************************************
"You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don't try."
Un:
La manière au coeur d'un homme est par son estomac. Un repas gentil les entre dans une bonne humeur.
Deux:
La manière ils prennent vos sacs lourds, valises de sorte que vous ne deviez pas porter le poids.
Trois:
La manière ils repoussent les cheveux qui tombent sur votre visage.
Quatre:
La manière ils arrangent une partie impromptue de dîner quand vous avez eu un jour dur juste pour vous encourager.
Cinq:
La manière ils vous apportent des chocolats quand ils savent que vous avez été seul toute la journée.
Six:
La manière ils faites des plaisanteries idiotes juste pour vous faire le sourire quand vous avez des larmes dans vos yeux.
Sept:
La manière ils portent toujours un mouchoir propre pour vous donner au cas où vous commenceriez à pleurer.
Huit:
La manière ils recherchent de petites raisons de prolonger la conversation de dîner de sorte que vous puissiez être ensemble pour plus longtemps.
Neuf:
La manière ils font des excuses pour éviter une date juste pour pouvoir observer un match de football sans vous gêner.
Dix:
La manière qu'ils feignent pour être de grands chefs quand vous vous plaignez au sujet de leur ne pas aider dans la cuisine.
************************************************************************************
"You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don't try."
Friday, 28 April 2006
Marriages made in heaven
Broaching the matter
A morning in mid-August 2004
"How do you like this one?" Mom asked, trying to sound as casual as possible, while pushing the photograph to me across the breakfast table.
"Smart, ok, ... what does he do?" I answered, only half-interested.
"Let's see, now what did P. Attya (Dad's sister) tell me about this one... umm... here it is, a 'Consultant - Technical'. Seems like he is doing well. What do you think?"
"Mom, that doesn't mean anything! The chief technician at the local garage down the road could also be called Consulant - Technical."
"Oh, all right, I'll get some more details from P. But he has an M.S. from NY and has been in a stable well-paying job in the U.S. for the past three years. Seems to come from a good educated family too, you know, his father was a Colonel in the Army and now works in the Gulf. His mother has been in the teaching profession. They belong to the same community as us, too. Will you at least agree to talk to him?"
"Hmm... let me know what you find out and then I'll talk. Got to run now, Mommy. The boss has called a full-day meeting for the annual review. Will be back late this evening."
And that's how I first came to know of AS.
The Introduction
Late August 2004
Mom did all her homework and passed on AS' contact information to me. The Internet bridges (almost) all gaps between people today. And so we got in touch, me and AS, over email.
Mom's initial impression soon became my own impression of AS. He was smart, ambitious, enthusiastic and even endearing. Over the next six months, we graduated to chat sessions and then phone calls, which went from a weekly to bi-weekly to almost daily frequency.
The meeting
March 2005
By now AS and I had exchanged enough notes to know that we wanted to get to know each other much better. It was perfect that he had decided to take his annual vacation then and would be spending time in Mumbai. I could hardly wait to find out if my impressions would indeed be the reality.
We met at a neat restaurant in central Mumbai over lunch, just me and him. At the end of the meal, he made as if to shake my hand, as we got ready to take leave of each other. But instead, he took my hand and held it for much longer than a few moments. I was just recovering from the unexpected gesture when he spoke my mind and asked if he could meet my parents.
My parents were pleased but cautious. They were realising for the first time that it might soon be time for them to let go of their darling daughter and trust a strange person (almost) with her well-being.
Next steps
The meeting between the families went much better and faster than I had expected. His parents took to me as quickly as AS had. I was flattered. At the end of the next few days, which I only remember hazily because they went by so quickly, I had a ring on my finger. It read 'A-S', a combination of our names. He had a similar one on his finger. I was engaged!! Just like that! After having spent exactly 11.5 hours with the man that I had now decided to spend the rest of my life with! I must have been extremely gullible or he extremely confident ... :)
Planning the Big Day
The wedding date was set for a year later, summer 2006. AS left almost soon after the matter was 'arranged'. He would return just in time for the wedding. A long wait for both of us. But worth the while, I thought, and he too.
Maharashtrian weddings are not known to be exceptionally large-scale, flashy and entertaining events. Yet there was a lot of work to be done. Mom and Dad quickly sat down to chalk out a check-list:
- Booking the hall for the wedding (since they go so quickly during the wedding season and dates are difficult to accommodate)
- Finding the punditji (priest) to conduct the pre-wedding, wedding and post-wedding rituals
- Guest lists, invitee lists (oh trust me, this does take a long, long time!)
- Checking out the optimal catering services
- Logistics for some of the guests who would be arriving from out of town
- Printing invitation cards
- Gifts for the important people in the family (yes, you are supposed to give gifts to people when you get married... wasn't it supposed to be the other way round...?)
- Garnering help from family and friends to get everything in order
- etc. ...
I, in the meanwhile, had other things to take care of:
- At work, preparing my boss and colleagues for my departure, as I would be moving to the US with AS. I had spent over a year and half with the team and we had grown to become a family
- With friends, catching up with the gang, people that I'd grown up with, from kindergarten, school, college, b-school, the colony, and inviting them for my special day
- At home, spending more time with family, learning to cook, being nicer to my little brother, consoling Mom when she would sporadically become sentimental about 'sending me away', as she called it, getting nostalgic about all the wonderful times I had shared with my wonderful family, sobbing just a little over how I'd miss them, albeit secretly so that they wouldn't get maudlin too
During this time, I also came to realise how much wider my social network had suddenly become. AS, being the only child, did not have any close siblings that I would have to learn to like. But he did have close uncles and aunts and cousins, whom, I found it was surprisingly easy to like. Their acceptance of me in their family was one more source of confirmation that I had made the right decision.
The 'V' word
Of course, there was the question of how I would get to the US. AS helped me a great deal with getting my papers organised for the visa, finding me the right consultant to help out with the documentation, and goading me to keep track of consulate interview dates.
Having heard several visa 'horror' stories, I was rather nervous about how I'd go through with the interview. AS calmed my nerves and encouraged me to be optimistic and focussed. He would take care of all the rest, he said. He also had some bright ideas for job opportunities for me once I got there.
So far, so good.
The Big Day
22nd April 2006
So that's how it feels - the end of one phase of life, the start of another. Anxiety, excitement, apprehension, nervousness and a quiet exhilaration took turns in controlling my mental state that day. AS had arrived only a few days earlier but looked much calmer and more composed than I was. That comforted me a great deal.
The day marked the culmination of all the work that had gone on behind the scenes over the past year. The decorations in the wedding hall, the barrage of guests from the bride's and the groom's sides, the punditji's chanting of sacred mantras to signify the union of these two bodies and souls. It is difficult to state exactly what I felt at the moment that the varmalas (garlands) were exchanged, signalling the conclusion of the wedding ceremony, hence, pronouncing us a married couple. But I do remember sending up quick prayers to the Lord Almighty to give us, me and AS, the strength, perseverance and love for each other, to make this association a long-lasting one.
Married!
It's been almost a week as Mrs. AS. The feeling is sinking in slowly. And it still feels good. I must have done something right, after all. :)
[Meeta: Now, to straighten all facts, S is my sis-in-law and AS, my dear cousin. Having shared some of the anxiety, concerns and excitement with S during her run up to the wedding, I felt I should dedicate this post to the young couple.
Wish you all the best, guys! Hope you love, care for, and keep each other for as long as you live. Be happy!]
*************************************************************************************
"Don't wait. The time will never be just right."
A morning in mid-August 2004
"How do you like this one?" Mom asked, trying to sound as casual as possible, while pushing the photograph to me across the breakfast table.
"Smart, ok, ... what does he do?" I answered, only half-interested.
"Let's see, now what did P. Attya (Dad's sister) tell me about this one... umm... here it is, a 'Consultant - Technical'. Seems like he is doing well. What do you think?"
"Mom, that doesn't mean anything! The chief technician at the local garage down the road could also be called Consulant - Technical."
"Oh, all right, I'll get some more details from P. But he has an M.S. from NY and has been in a stable well-paying job in the U.S. for the past three years. Seems to come from a good educated family too, you know, his father was a Colonel in the Army and now works in the Gulf. His mother has been in the teaching profession. They belong to the same community as us, too. Will you at least agree to talk to him?"
"Hmm... let me know what you find out and then I'll talk. Got to run now, Mommy. The boss has called a full-day meeting for the annual review. Will be back late this evening."
And that's how I first came to know of AS.
The Introduction
Late August 2004
Mom did all her homework and passed on AS' contact information to me. The Internet bridges (almost) all gaps between people today. And so we got in touch, me and AS, over email.
Mom's initial impression soon became my own impression of AS. He was smart, ambitious, enthusiastic and even endearing. Over the next six months, we graduated to chat sessions and then phone calls, which went from a weekly to bi-weekly to almost daily frequency.
The meeting
March 2005
By now AS and I had exchanged enough notes to know that we wanted to get to know each other much better. It was perfect that he had decided to take his annual vacation then and would be spending time in Mumbai. I could hardly wait to find out if my impressions would indeed be the reality.
We met at a neat restaurant in central Mumbai over lunch, just me and him. At the end of the meal, he made as if to shake my hand, as we got ready to take leave of each other. But instead, he took my hand and held it for much longer than a few moments. I was just recovering from the unexpected gesture when he spoke my mind and asked if he could meet my parents.
My parents were pleased but cautious. They were realising for the first time that it might soon be time for them to let go of their darling daughter and trust a strange person (almost) with her well-being.
Next steps
The meeting between the families went much better and faster than I had expected. His parents took to me as quickly as AS had. I was flattered. At the end of the next few days, which I only remember hazily because they went by so quickly, I had a ring on my finger. It read 'A-S', a combination of our names. He had a similar one on his finger. I was engaged!! Just like that! After having spent exactly 11.5 hours with the man that I had now decided to spend the rest of my life with! I must have been extremely gullible or he extremely confident ... :)
Planning the Big Day
The wedding date was set for a year later, summer 2006. AS left almost soon after the matter was 'arranged'. He would return just in time for the wedding. A long wait for both of us. But worth the while, I thought, and he too.
Maharashtrian weddings are not known to be exceptionally large-scale, flashy and entertaining events. Yet there was a lot of work to be done. Mom and Dad quickly sat down to chalk out a check-list:
- Booking the hall for the wedding (since they go so quickly during the wedding season and dates are difficult to accommodate)
- Finding the punditji (priest) to conduct the pre-wedding, wedding and post-wedding rituals
- Guest lists, invitee lists (oh trust me, this does take a long, long time!)
- Checking out the optimal catering services
- Logistics for some of the guests who would be arriving from out of town
- Printing invitation cards
- Gifts for the important people in the family (yes, you are supposed to give gifts to people when you get married... wasn't it supposed to be the other way round...?)
- Garnering help from family and friends to get everything in order
- etc. ...
I, in the meanwhile, had other things to take care of:
- At work, preparing my boss and colleagues for my departure, as I would be moving to the US with AS. I had spent over a year and half with the team and we had grown to become a family
- With friends, catching up with the gang, people that I'd grown up with, from kindergarten, school, college, b-school, the colony, and inviting them for my special day
- At home, spending more time with family, learning to cook, being nicer to my little brother, consoling Mom when she would sporadically become sentimental about 'sending me away', as she called it, getting nostalgic about all the wonderful times I had shared with my wonderful family, sobbing just a little over how I'd miss them, albeit secretly so that they wouldn't get maudlin too
During this time, I also came to realise how much wider my social network had suddenly become. AS, being the only child, did not have any close siblings that I would have to learn to like. But he did have close uncles and aunts and cousins, whom, I found it was surprisingly easy to like. Their acceptance of me in their family was one more source of confirmation that I had made the right decision.
The 'V' word
Of course, there was the question of how I would get to the US. AS helped me a great deal with getting my papers organised for the visa, finding me the right consultant to help out with the documentation, and goading me to keep track of consulate interview dates.
Having heard several visa 'horror' stories, I was rather nervous about how I'd go through with the interview. AS calmed my nerves and encouraged me to be optimistic and focussed. He would take care of all the rest, he said. He also had some bright ideas for job opportunities for me once I got there.
So far, so good.
The Big Day
22nd April 2006
So that's how it feels - the end of one phase of life, the start of another. Anxiety, excitement, apprehension, nervousness and a quiet exhilaration took turns in controlling my mental state that day. AS had arrived only a few days earlier but looked much calmer and more composed than I was. That comforted me a great deal.
The day marked the culmination of all the work that had gone on behind the scenes over the past year. The decorations in the wedding hall, the barrage of guests from the bride's and the groom's sides, the punditji's chanting of sacred mantras to signify the union of these two bodies and souls. It is difficult to state exactly what I felt at the moment that the varmalas (garlands) were exchanged, signalling the conclusion of the wedding ceremony, hence, pronouncing us a married couple. But I do remember sending up quick prayers to the Lord Almighty to give us, me and AS, the strength, perseverance and love for each other, to make this association a long-lasting one.
Married!
It's been almost a week as Mrs. AS. The feeling is sinking in slowly. And it still feels good. I must have done something right, after all. :)
[Meeta: Now, to straighten all facts, S is my sis-in-law and AS, my dear cousin. Having shared some of the anxiety, concerns and excitement with S during her run up to the wedding, I felt I should dedicate this post to the young couple.
Wish you all the best, guys! Hope you love, care for, and keep each other for as long as you live. Be happy!]
*************************************************************************************
"Don't wait. The time will never be just right."
Tuesday, 28 March 2006
Sweet vagaries
For some reason the word 'vagary' reminds of something sugary... maybe because it rhymes with 'jaggery'...
Every once in a while I feel the need to upset things just a little bit, just to feel that I'm alive, that something is moving, that things are going somewhere, that I'm not an unwilling victim of inertia.
But sometimes the "things" take control! When they do, life is nothing short of a rollercoaster ride, almost like a huge upheaval that tosses you high, high up in the air and then suddenly plunges you to the bottom of the sea. And at the end of the twisted journey, you feel like the piece of laundry that has been whish-whooshed about helplessly in a washing machine and wrung hard, separated from the wetness ... of emotion.
A friend of mine is a poetess in her own right. Her words brought a weird sense of calm. But not before I realised that I wanted to cry, smile, shrug, escape, laugh, scream, give up, and begin again all at once!
Sweet, huh?! I'm trying to retrieve some of the moisture. I want to feel again!
*************************************************************************************
"The only gift is a portion of thyself."
Every once in a while I feel the need to upset things just a little bit, just to feel that I'm alive, that something is moving, that things are going somewhere, that I'm not an unwilling victim of inertia.
But sometimes the "things" take control! When they do, life is nothing short of a rollercoaster ride, almost like a huge upheaval that tosses you high, high up in the air and then suddenly plunges you to the bottom of the sea. And at the end of the twisted journey, you feel like the piece of laundry that has been whish-whooshed about helplessly in a washing machine and wrung hard, separated from the wetness ... of emotion.
A friend of mine is a poetess in her own right. Her words brought a weird sense of calm. But not before I realised that I wanted to cry, smile, shrug, escape, laugh, scream, give up, and begin again all at once!
Sweet, huh?! I'm trying to retrieve some of the moisture. I want to feel again!
*************************************************************************************
"The only gift is a portion of thyself."
Monday, 20 March 2006
Strong enough?
Thought for the day... why me??!!
Why does the flicker of light at the end of the tunnel suddenly go out with no promise of return?
Why does one suffer despite trying so hard?
Why do we go on hoping that things will change long after all reasons for hope are gone?
Why do we hurt someone when we are actually trying our best to make them happy?
Why do people grow apart?
Why is it so difficult to start over again?
Why do we still believe after all faith has been destroyed?
... human after all...
*************************************************************************************
"Nothing worth achieving comes easy."
Why does the flicker of light at the end of the tunnel suddenly go out with no promise of return?
Why does one suffer despite trying so hard?
Why do we go on hoping that things will change long after all reasons for hope are gone?
Why do we hurt someone when we are actually trying our best to make them happy?
Why do people grow apart?
Why is it so difficult to start over again?
Why do we still believe after all faith has been destroyed?
... human after all...
*************************************************************************************
"Nothing worth achieving comes easy."
Tuesday, 28 February 2006
a song from long ago
It was my first memorable brush with day-dreaming, romanticism, butterflies in the stomach, blushed cheeks, and flaming ears ... more than a decade ago. All that I still remember is the fuzzy, tingling feeling of it all. And a song...
Over mountains,
Over trees,
Over oceans,
Over seas,
Across the desert,
I'll be there.
In a whisper
On the wind.
On the smile of a friend
Just think of me,
And I'll be there.
Today, the song still brings back that warm, fuzzy feeling. But now I think of somebody. And I want them to know... I'll be there!
*************************************************************************************
"To be interested in the changing seasons is a happier state of mind than to be hopelessly in love with spring."
Over mountains,
Over trees,
Over oceans,
Over seas,
Across the desert,
I'll be there.
In a whisper
On the wind.
On the smile of a friend
Just think of me,
And I'll be there.
Today, the song still brings back that warm, fuzzy feeling. But now I think of somebody. And I want them to know... I'll be there!
*************************************************************************************
"To be interested in the changing seasons is a happier state of mind than to be hopelessly in love with spring."
Saturday, 21 January 2006
Getting on
"How are you doing?"
"Getting on, " I replied, to a friend's innocent casual query. He raised an eyebrow quizzically. "You are not even two-thirds my age, you know, why so precocious? Don't be in a hurry to grow up. :-)"
I realised once again how much more I still have to learn about the English language, about the world around me, about life, about living. Another birthday just went by. I stopped counting the years once the candles went beyond 18! Remember Bryan Adams' inpiring rendition - "18 till I die?" That was my motto for a long time... still is, in many ways. But there are good things about growing older. And note, I say 'growing older', not 'growing old'!
Once one is past one’s 21st birthday, the change of digits in the units place doesn’t matter too much until the 25th birthday and after that, even the change of the digits in the tens place doesn’t matter so much until the 40th birthday. Do I, then, claim to have the experience and wisdom of a 40-year old? (I’m on the wrong side of 25 but not that far gone yet!)
No, some philosophy from a random blogger is not always a candidate for a prize-winning manuscript on human experiences and behaviour. But I have learned a few things that are likely to remain with me for some time to come.
On work
(because I’ve started feeling only recently that I’m officially a part of the global workforce, not distracted by educational pursuits, familial obligations, and/ or pathological relationships)
I’ve learned
... that first impressions, especially of a colleague, will inevitably not be my last. On so many occasions in these past months, I’ve been surprised at the revelation of different sides of personalities – luckily, the surprise has been pleasant most times.
... that you are new in a job only as long as your first day.
... that the onus of setting expectations lies on you ... at all times.
... that you can never be over-prepared for a meeting.
... that, at the end of the day, face-time does translate into brownie points; literally, because it means you party with your team till late in the night.
... that a colleague who feels (s)he is not rewarded justly (vis-à-vis you) can teach you a lot about competition.
... that work can only be as much fun as the workplace; as a corollary, a fun workplace can make most types of work fun too.
... that seniority and subordination are attached neither to your title nor to your years of experience, but to the level of confidence with which you do and exhibit your work.
... that just doing a job well is not enough; you must show it off!
... that you must speak up if you have a good idea because your boss does not know everything; in fact, (s) he could be waiting to be educated by you.
... that having a vocation will always be extremely important for me…
On family
I’ve learned
... that no matter what, my family will be the dearest people on earth for me.
... that I would consider my life well-spent if I could make and keep them happy.
... that in my moments of deepest despair, I only need them to believe in me, and just that would help me stand up again.
... that if I talk about them for longer than a few minutes, then I will certainly be overcome by emotion.
So, let’s switch to another topic!
On friends
I’ve learned
... that, clichéd as it may be, a genuine friendship will stand the test of time. I know that I could pick up the phone and call some people to talk about things nearest to my heart and be warmly received even when I haven’t spoken with them in years.
... that one of the greatest riches I’ve gained in all my years is my friends. A life without at least one deposit in the friendship bank would be the poorest life on earth, indeed.
... that some people can only be your friends, not siblings, lovers, parent-figures or mentors… Thank God for that! Life would be less colourful if they signed up for another role.
... that I may not be able to live with the friends that I think I could never live without. Funny, huh?!
On cooking, eating, driving, swimming, climbing a tree, sleeping, talking, dancing
Some things are essential know-hows for life, in general,… and some others for me , in particular
I’ve learned
... that I’m glad I can cook and that I’d be glad to help anyone learn how to. I’d have the satisfaction of having imparted one of the most critical skills of modern living to a human being.
... that I’m glad I’m not fussy about food. It not only allows me to survive just fine in a new place but also helps me to build a rapport and relationship with my hosts in a foreign land.
... that it’s not enough for me to know how to drive to save my life; that I must also know enough to save another’s life.
... that swimming and climbing a tree are not just a useful exercise regimen but also critical techniques for survival in an emergency. I will be pursuing at least one diligently this year… no points for guessing which!
... that I still have to learn to fall asleep when the situation demands. Shuttling across time-zones on a bi-weekly basis and too many red-eye flights are not going to help my sleep cycle.
... that I could not spend more than a day without talking to a real human being for at least ten minutes. And no, voicemails and recorded messages will not help.
... that I still harbour a little girl’s dream to become a full-time dancer sometime in my life.
On love
... that beautiful, pure, calm, secure, generous emotion called “love”... umm ...
I’ve learned
... that you can't hurry love; and when it happens, you can't stop it.
... that you can't force someone to love you; equally, you can't stop someone from loving you.
... that when you love someone, it shows ...
... that love is uplifting. Why, then, is it called "falling" in love?
I've realised... that I’m ready to rise to love.
************************************************************************************
"Woh dariya hi kya jis mein na ho ravaani,
Agar josh na ho, to kis kaam ki hai yeh jawaani?!"
[What good is a stream that doesn't flow with abandon? What good is youth if it is not stirred by undiluted passion?]
"Getting on, " I replied, to a friend's innocent casual query. He raised an eyebrow quizzically. "You are not even two-thirds my age, you know, why so precocious? Don't be in a hurry to grow up. :-)"
I realised once again how much more I still have to learn about the English language, about the world around me, about life, about living. Another birthday just went by. I stopped counting the years once the candles went beyond 18! Remember Bryan Adams' inpiring rendition - "18 till I die?" That was my motto for a long time... still is, in many ways. But there are good things about growing older. And note, I say 'growing older', not 'growing old'!
Once one is past one’s 21st birthday, the change of digits in the units place doesn’t matter too much until the 25th birthday and after that, even the change of the digits in the tens place doesn’t matter so much until the 40th birthday. Do I, then, claim to have the experience and wisdom of a 40-year old? (I’m on the wrong side of 25 but not that far gone yet!)
No, some philosophy from a random blogger is not always a candidate for a prize-winning manuscript on human experiences and behaviour. But I have learned a few things that are likely to remain with me for some time to come.
On work
(because I’ve started feeling only recently that I’m officially a part of the global workforce, not distracted by educational pursuits, familial obligations, and/ or pathological relationships)
I’ve learned
... that first impressions, especially of a colleague, will inevitably not be my last. On so many occasions in these past months, I’ve been surprised at the revelation of different sides of personalities – luckily, the surprise has been pleasant most times.
... that you are new in a job only as long as your first day.
... that the onus of setting expectations lies on you ... at all times.
... that you can never be over-prepared for a meeting.
... that, at the end of the day, face-time does translate into brownie points; literally, because it means you party with your team till late in the night.
... that a colleague who feels (s)he is not rewarded justly (vis-à-vis you) can teach you a lot about competition.
... that work can only be as much fun as the workplace; as a corollary, a fun workplace can make most types of work fun too.
... that seniority and subordination are attached neither to your title nor to your years of experience, but to the level of confidence with which you do and exhibit your work.
... that just doing a job well is not enough; you must show it off!
... that you must speak up if you have a good idea because your boss does not know everything; in fact, (s) he could be waiting to be educated by you.
... that having a vocation will always be extremely important for me…
On family
I’ve learned
... that no matter what, my family will be the dearest people on earth for me.
... that I would consider my life well-spent if I could make and keep them happy.
... that in my moments of deepest despair, I only need them to believe in me, and just that would help me stand up again.
... that if I talk about them for longer than a few minutes, then I will certainly be overcome by emotion.
So, let’s switch to another topic!
On friends
I’ve learned
... that, clichéd as it may be, a genuine friendship will stand the test of time. I know that I could pick up the phone and call some people to talk about things nearest to my heart and be warmly received even when I haven’t spoken with them in years.
... that one of the greatest riches I’ve gained in all my years is my friends. A life without at least one deposit in the friendship bank would be the poorest life on earth, indeed.
... that some people can only be your friends, not siblings, lovers, parent-figures or mentors… Thank God for that! Life would be less colourful if they signed up for another role.
... that I may not be able to live with the friends that I think I could never live without. Funny, huh?!
On cooking, eating, driving, swimming, climbing a tree, sleeping, talking, dancing
Some things are essential know-hows for life, in general,… and some others for me , in particular
I’ve learned
... that I’m glad I can cook and that I’d be glad to help anyone learn how to. I’d have the satisfaction of having imparted one of the most critical skills of modern living to a human being.
... that I’m glad I’m not fussy about food. It not only allows me to survive just fine in a new place but also helps me to build a rapport and relationship with my hosts in a foreign land.
... that it’s not enough for me to know how to drive to save my life; that I must also know enough to save another’s life.
... that swimming and climbing a tree are not just a useful exercise regimen but also critical techniques for survival in an emergency. I will be pursuing at least one diligently this year… no points for guessing which!
... that I still have to learn to fall asleep when the situation demands. Shuttling across time-zones on a bi-weekly basis and too many red-eye flights are not going to help my sleep cycle.
... that I could not spend more than a day without talking to a real human being for at least ten minutes. And no, voicemails and recorded messages will not help.
... that I still harbour a little girl’s dream to become a full-time dancer sometime in my life.
On love
... that beautiful, pure, calm, secure, generous emotion called “love”... umm ...
I’ve learned
... that you can't hurry love; and when it happens, you can't stop it.
... that you can't force someone to love you; equally, you can't stop someone from loving you.
... that when you love someone, it shows ...
... that love is uplifting. Why, then, is it called "falling" in love?
I've realised... that I’m ready to rise to love.
************************************************************************************
"Woh dariya hi kya jis mein na ho ravaani,
Agar josh na ho, to kis kaam ki hai yeh jawaani?!"
[What good is a stream that doesn't flow with abandon? What good is youth if it is not stirred by undiluted passion?]
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)